Q1: Who are Numbnutz?
Jay: We’re the soundtrack to your stepdad’s mental breakdown while he’s grilling shirtless in winter.
Jerryl: The crust in the corner of society’s eye when it wakes up too late for work.
Steven: Basically just three dudes who should be legally prohibited from owning instruments.
Q2: How did you form?
Jay: Detention after I mooned the choir teacher. Saw Jerryl carving ‘GG Allin is God’ into his desk and knew it was fate.
Jerryl: Yeah, then Steven wandered in thinking it was woodshop and we just kept him.
Steven: Best accident of my life. Worse for everyone else though.
Q3: Biggest influence?
Jay: Expired Monster energy drinks and generational trauma.
Jerryl: Mold growing on my shower curtain. Beautiful patterns, man.
Steven: The sound my car makes when it’s about to explode. Music to my ears.
Q4: Favorite venue?
Jay: Anywhere with no fire exits. If it’s up to code, we’re not playing there.
Jerryl: That abandoned Chuck E. Cheese we broke into last winter. Acoustics sucked but the rat suit was worth it.
Steven: Honestly, your grandma’s funeral. Open bar and zero cover charge.
Q5: Dream collaboration?
Jay: GG Allin, but he’d just end up throwing poop at us. Ideal.
Jerryl: A raccoon trapped in a trash can. Nature’s original percussionist.
Steven: Nickelback. Jay would kill me before the session ends though.
Q6: First song you wrote?
Jay: “AAAAAA.” It’s just six A’s screamed over a broken snare. Art.
Jerryl: Followed by “BBBBBB,” our experimental phase.
Steven: Critics said it was “unlistenable” which is exactly what we were going for.
Q7: Who writes the lyrics?
Jay: Mostly me, but Jerryl adds words I can’t spell.
Jerryl: Steven contributes by drooling on the paper, adds texture.
Steven: I write the emotional parts. Like “I’m sad cause I ran outta glue.”
Q8: Favorite lyric?
Jay: “Stick a fork in me.” Speaks to my soul and my dinner choices.
Jerryl: “Piss test failed again.” My life motto.
Steven: “Spray it til it screams.” Axe body spray never smelled so violent.
Q9: What’s your goal as a band?
Jay: To make exactly zero dollars and alienate everyone we know.
Jerryl: I want to be banned in at least 40 states before I die.
Steven: To one day headline a show where nobody shows up. Ultimate punk flex.
Q10: Advice to fans?
Jay: Quit your job, start a band, ruin your life.
Jerryl: Never trust a clean punk.
Steven: If you’re listening to us unironically, seek professional help.
Q11: Worst show?
Jay: That youth group charity gig. Apparently “Huffin Paint” wasn’t Christ-approved.
Jerryl: Yeah, pastor threw a Bible at me mid-song. Great aim though.
Steven: Still kept it and used the pages for rolling papers later.
Q12: Favorite food?
Jay: Gas station sushi that’s been under the heat lamp for 8 hours.
Jerryl: Expired hot dogs with questionable slime.
Steven: I once ate a cigarette butt off the ground for a dare. Pretty filling actually.
Q13: If not music, what?
Jay: Dead in a ditch probably.
Jerryl: Spray painting dicks on overpasses full time.
Steven: Twitch streamer. I’m built for failure.
Q14: Favorite band?
Jay: Numbnutz. Duh.
Jerryl: Numbnutz acoustic.
Steven: Nickelback… (Jay stabs Steven’s thigh with a fork)
Q15: Pre-show ritual?
Jay: Vaping glue fumes while crying in the bathroom.
Jerryl: Not showering for a solid week before. Adds to the aura.
Steven: Two shots of hot dog water. Keeps the vocal cords lubricated.
Q16: Greatest fear?
Jay: Waking up and realizing I’m actually in Blink-182.
Jerryl: Being forced to shower.
Steven: Sobriety. Or Jay’s driving. Both equally deadly.
Q17: Most illegal thing you’ve done?
Jay: This interview.
Jerryl: Defecated on stage while playing bass naked. Ohio still pressing charges.
Steven: Can’t say. Pending litigation.
Q18: Will you ever grow up?
Jay: Absolutely not.
Jerryl: I refuse.
Steven: Already did, hated it, came back.
Q19: Last words?
Jay: Buy our merch or don’t, we’ll steal from you anyway.
Jerryl: Tell your mom I said hi.
Steven: Don’t do drugs. Unless it’s glue.
Q20: Final thoughts on Rolling Stone?
Jay: Thanks for wasting our time.
Jerryl: Next time bring beer.
Steven: This probably ruined your reputation more than ours.